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Submitted on
December 2, 2012


ep... I did my last stand,I'm goin.I know you are thinking ''he's lying he did it before'' but I'm really going.Lately I was in a dangerous mood and a stupid person.One decision changed my life.Made me suffer and try to kill myself.But I couldn't,I survived I used to be a light of one girls life.I screwed it,I was afraid,and confused that I made so many wrong things...I failed...I'm sorry I let you down.This won't help I know.But I am a paranoid now.Getting scared from people only feelings safe in my own room aand dying,slowly.Sanity is low,tried to kill self over and over again,cried for days.Couldn't take anymore.So I was in lockdown,wouldn't let anyone inside my room.Still not letting...wishing I was never born to make no trouble.Because I'm weak... I lost steven and jayden after that and lilly....and now one of the chains of my heart gone...kathy.I broke her heart badly,I never tought I could be that stupid.Now just gone to zero... Hour after hour I remember her arts and comments on her new journal step by step self-destrucktion I hope you all be happy without me.No need to stop me from it.I will be alone...don't care about me,hate me for this choisemy legs,arms and hands are shaking I can't sleep,I can't live,I can't smile...not anymore this might be my last journal,if u say something like ''please stay'' and I won't reply congrats I'm gone.Now you know how to finish me off,the choise is yours.Finish
  • Mood: Defeated
  • Listening to: Falling inside the Black by skillet
  • Reading: Iceshards journal
  • Watching: Self tearing apart
  • Playing: -
  • Eating: I prefer dying
  • Drinking: I prefer dying
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XXEmoWolfMoonXX Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Student General Artist
I used to feel terrible....
thought no one loved me.....
thought if I was gone, I'd make so many happy...
but then I thought, what would i do without my friends...
Then i realized there are people who actually care,
people tat make me feel good,
I still can't truly smile, but I can feel good about myself

If you were dead, I would more then likely cut, be severly depressed, and
everything I've ever thought about myself would come full force back
I would shut everyone, and I do mean everyone out of my life.......

My point is.........I would care if you were dead, my fragile heart wuld break......

I'm crying much right now.......
sonic654 Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Thats why i putted u to my İD,ur keeping me here
XXEmoWolfMoonXX Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student General Artist
How am I keeping you here? Y-You never explained that.....
sonic654 Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012  Student Digital Artist
I'm leaving,farewell...
XXEmoWolfMoonXX Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Student General Artist
sonic654 Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Don't worry Cole is still here,he will be waiting your notes ^_^ >>M<<
XXEmoWolfMoonXX Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012  Student General Artist
So I send him a note? :?
sonic654 Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Sure,why not
(1 Reply)
chibiloverqueen Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Student General Artist
too be honest not being rude but so many people have a worse life than u just sayin so u should rly be happy with wat u have got and i dont rly want u too leave... but bye...
sonic654 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Their life's are painful for their ow selves mines painful for me too if we had lived like that we all would be them
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